This Expert Interview is with Michelle Segar, PhD, MPH, researcher at the Institute for Research on Women and Gender at the University of Michigan. Her expertise is creating sustainable exercise motivation and self care for women. Learn more about her and her program at Essential Steps. She’s got a lot of wisdom to share!

Sunday we celebrate moms. You might get flowers, a gift certificate or even a home cooked meal. But the absolute best gift you’ll get this Mother’s Day is the one you give to yourself.

While being a mom is incredibly rewarding, it’s easy to lose some of yourself in the process. You know, the old you that but you first. If you could get some of you back, wrapped up in a gift you could access anytime, wouldn’t you want it?

Lately I’ve been missing my old self. And I’ve decided that I’m the only one who can do something about it. I know I could never get the old me back — and I really don’t want to (because I’m better now, right?).

So I talked with my friend and colleague Michelle Segar, PhD, MPH, a women’s motivation psychologist at the University of Michigan, to figure out how moms like me can carve out a little time for ourselves. She calls it “self care.” I call it smart.

What Gets in the Way?

Dr. Segar starts by discussing the barriers mothers face when it comes to making themselves a priority.

The first one is that moms have a lot on their plates. Even though most families (65%) have both parents working, moms still do a majority of the work around the house. According to the Second Shift study, husbands do about one-third the household chores and those tend to include home maintenance. Women tend to do the everyday chores like cooking, cleaning and keeping track of kids’ activities.

Another barrier, tied closely to the first, is that women don’t know how to ask for relief.

“Women haven’t been socialized to make taking care of themselves a priority,” says Segar. “We’re just not socialized to think that way.”

Segar explains that most women never learned to consider their well-being as something that is important enough to plan and stand up for. They may feel bad saying “no” or simply don’t know the most effective way to approach their spouse or partner. This might be why so many arguments happen as resentment grows and then “pop!” Segar challenges us to consider why our own daily well-being shouldn’t be one of the most important things in our lives?

And the third barrier for moms is their tendency to focus a lot of their self-care energy on losing weight.

“So many women put their energy into getting thinner, again, and again, without seeing lasting results when instead they could be engaging in self-care activities that are more likely to nurture and restore and truly feed the self,” she says. “At its core, self-care is about feeling good.”

Segar explains that taking care of yourself is like an essential vitamin you take every day. It empowers and restores instead of zapping you of energy. Because of that, it makes you a more effective mom, friend and coworker.

So with this in mind, here are three steps you can take start taking better care of you.

1. Pause. Segar suggests before taking any action you should you assess where you are first by asking yourself how you feel.

On scale of 1 to 5, 1 being terrible and 5 great, where do you stand? If it’s a 1 or 2 on a regular basis, then things aren’t going very well, but if you get a 4 or a 5, you’re probably getting your needs met.

If you’re not happy with the way things are you need to ask yourself if it’s time to change. Segar says that making the decision is the hardest part, but to remember that you DESERVE to feel good.

2. Decide what you want.

Once you decide there’s room for improvement, you’ll want to consider what it is you want to do.

“Take a step back and think about what self-care means to you,” say Segar. “Self-care means different things to different women whether it be sleep, pampering or going for a walk.”

Segar says every woman needs to check in with her own reality. For example, a women with 4 kids under 6 years old will be very strapped for time. Even though she can’t get everything she wants right now, she can try some key things that might improve her well-being in some way.

Segar advices moms to try taking action on a much smaller scale and see it makes them feel. Try something for 5 minutes if that is all the time you have. Did it make you feel better? She also says creating a “self-care mission” is important because it will help you make a plan. And let’s face it, without a plan things just don’t get done.

3. Negotiate with your partner.

Once you know what you want, you’ll have to talk to your partner and negotiate (if you have one).

“Be frank and honest and ask for what you need,” says Segar “But then make sure to ask your partner what he or she needs too.”

Even though you may feel your partner or spouse has it easier than you, they likely have unmet needs too. By addressing his or her desires, you make the discussion about both of you getting what you want. So instead of the typical get-no-where fight, you have a collaboration. And hopefully you both will feel excited about your new plan.

Segar goes as far as recommending you have regular meetings with your partner to check in and see how things are going. You might need to revise the plan based on what is and isn’t working.

So this Mother’s Day, I say forget the candy, flowers and other fancy gifts and start asking for what you really want and need. I know I will.

How are you feeling about motherhood? Overwhelmed? Having trouble finding time for you? Any success stories out there?

Last week I wrote a few guest posts that I want to let you all know about. The first, Why Mom’s Nutrition May be the Most Important of All, was posted on Expect the Best Pregnancy, a site created as an extension of the book. I write about the importance of moms’ nutrition, especially after having a baby. While this post is geared towards new moms, all mothers can benefit from the take-home message of making their health a priority.

My second post was on Real Mom Nutrition. SallyKuzemchak, dietitian and creator of the site, read my post Why Every parent Needs a Feeding Strategy and had some follow-up questions. I answered them in her post titled What’s Your Feeding Strategy? Check it out.

My third guest post, How to Get Your Kids to Eat Just About Anything, was on Dumb Little Man, a popular site that provides tips to simplify life. This is a good review of the feeding advice I often write about here.

So as you can see, I’m getting around a bit. Helping to spread the message about raising healthy eaters.

I was in the downward dog position when I realized what was happening. I was actually enjoying yoga. Then it occurred to me that this was the third time that week I was following along the DVD tape. Not only was it pleasant, but I was fitting it into it into my everyday life without much of a fuss.

After 5 years of starting, stopping and starting again, I was thrilled to have made the “mental shift” that makes lasting behavior change possible.

As this year comes to a close, you probably are looking to add some healthy behaviors to your life. But how do you get to that place where you know the behavior is locked in for good? You first have to change how you change.

1. Start tiny: Five years ago after finally deciding to try yoga, my husband and I signed up for 2-weeks of unlimited classes at Yoga Works in Los Angeles. The only time we both could go was 6:30am — and all of the classes were an hour and a half. Needless to say, this intense program turned me off to yoga for some time (and they were beginner classes!).

But I clearly wasn’t ready to go from doing nothing to daily, hour and a half yoga classes. Now I understand that starting small, and building on from there, lets the desirable behavior evolve into something that works for my life. It wasn’t until I tried yoga at home for 15 minutes a day, that the habit started to take root.

2. Keep trying until you get it right: “Self efficacy,” the strong belief people have in their ability to obtain a goal, is a term often used by health professionals. Because people trying to adopt a new behavior don’t have much confidence in their ability (yet) they tend to lack self efficacy. So when they hit a roadblock, they easily give up saying, “I’m just not good at this.”

Knowing this can help you a great deal. Instead of giving up, do what someone with self efficacy would do: change strategies. And keep trying and adjusting until you see some progress. And then tweak it some more. This process of trial and error — and getting better at the desired behavior — will do wonders for your self efficacy.

3. Check your outlook: One of the reasons yoga has been difficult for me is because I was always telling myself I “should” do it. I’ve never been flexible but understood the important health benefits of flexibility. I also knew that yoga would help calm my over-active mind. Everywhere I turned someone new was telling me “you should do yoga.”

But the “shoulds” rarely motivate anyone to do anything. It wasn’t until I found my own reasons for doing yoga that I actively looked for ways to include it in my routine. You can get to this place early in the process by asking yourself what you want get out of the new behavior. As you work on making the behavior a habit, focus on how it improves the quality of your life.

4. Watch out for unrealistic expectations: In the late nineties researchers asked a group of obese women averaging 217 pounds their goal weights – separating them into categories such as “dream weight” and “disappointed weight.” Most women’s goal weight was a 69- pound loss, getting down to 148 pounds. After 48 weeks of treatment, almost 50 percent didn’t even reach their “disappointed weight” and lost 35 pounds (getting down to 182 pounds).

Psychologists call unrealistic expectations for change “false hope syndrome”– and it’s a key reason people throw in the towel. But here’s the kicker: no one knows for sure where their new endeavors will take them. By stating it all up front, you kill the chance of finding your own way. The way that allows for the crucial “mental shift” that locks in the new habit for good.

If any of your new goals include making healthy changes for you and your family, I hope you’ll stay tuned in to Raise Healthy Eaters in the New Year. I’ve got a lot coming in 2010 that I’ll let you know about soon.

What are some healthy changes you’d like to make in the New Year?

Like what you see? Subscribe to Raise Healthy Eaters

References
Foster GD, Wadden TA, Vogt RA, Brewer G. What is a reasonable weight loss? Patients’ expectations and evaluations of obesity treatment outcomes. J Consult Clin Psychol. 1997;65:79-85.

A couple of weeks ago nothing seemed to be working for me. The stress in my life became unmanageable so I utilized some strategies that clearly failed. I wrote about it in my guest blog for the Orlando Sentinel — Moms at Work Blog. I’m sure you can relate to how challenging it can be to get it all done. Especially with unpredictable (and cute) little ones running around.

As a mom, you don’t have to pay a lot of money for weight management advice. In fact, the best diet coaches just happen to be the same little ones running around your house.

Here are 3 things your kids can teach you about managing your weight:

1. Eat what you need: Young children are masters at regulating their food intake by getting exactly what they need. If kids graze on snacks all afternoon, for example, you can bet that they will barely touch their dinner.

Most adults have completely lost touch with their hunger and satiety cues. If this is you, make a point to tune in to how you feel at mealtime. Ask yourself if food is really what you need when you eat out of stress or boredom. Instead, eat when you are hungry and stop when satisfied. If you keep practicing, you’ll get better and better at it.

2. Enjoy life to the fullest: Young children need to be reminded to eat because they are so enthralled with life. Unfortunately, moms have so many responsibilities that they often forget what makes them feel alive. And when this happens, food can take on greater importance.

So make time for a hobby you love, call a friend to go out or reconnect with your spouse. Get back in touch with what you love about life and watch your desire to eat diminish.

3. Make physical activity fun: If you ever watch toddlers run and giggle you know how much enjoyment little ones get from being active. In fact, they hate to sit around when they could be moving. And they’re not picky about the “where” and “how” of physical activity.

Moms, on the other hand, feel like exercise is just another thing they have to get done. Instead of thinking of exercise in this way, look for pleasurable ways to be active. For example, turn on music at home and dance with your kids, chase them at the park and take time to walk and enjoy the view. See this article for more ideas.

The same things that can irritate you about your kids — picking at their meals, reminding them to eat and being active night and day — are the same things that can help you maintain a healthy weight. Not only can you learn from your kids, but you can remind yourself that you were like this when you were a child. And it might just be time to get some of the old you back.

Subscribe to Raise Healthy Eaters for more mom-centered health tips.

I write a lot about how moms need to make taking care of themselves a priority. Not only to be a positive role model for their kids, but to improve the quality of their lives and help them do their job better (day job and mom job). I am one of those so called “older moms” having my last child barely under 40. And now that I have two kids I’m more challenged than ever to fit in taking-care-of-me time.

Michelle Segar, a friend and colleague of mine, will be talking to Kelley Conners on live blog radio today about self care after having a baby (see below). The first time I talked to Michelle we instantly hit it off. We had the exact same ideas on how women can achieve healthier lives – and what gets in their way. The only difference is her expertise is exercise (and psychology) and mine is nutrition.

Michelle works mostly with midlife women but even you’re not quite 40, you can definitely get something from joining the call on Thursday, September 17th at 4:30pm (7:30 EST). As moms we need to find creative ways to take care of ourselves before time slips away and it gets even harder. If anyone can help you achieve a healthier lifestyle and manage your weight, it’s Michelle Segar. Don’t miss it!

Join Kelley Connors, host of Real Women on Health! in a new series, Mid-Life Mammas, which will take place on Thursday evenings at 7:30 EST and PST. Mid-life Mammas is for women over 40 who’ve just had their first or second baby! In this first of three series, Michelle will provide her insights on how coaching works, who is most successful in achieving results and how she helps women manage their weight, sustainably. You won’t be disappointed and there is no hype with this! Michelle Segar is America’s leading expert on exercise motivation for women over 40. She is the founder of the National Center for Women and Wellness and a Psychology Researcher at the Institute for Research on Women and Gender at the University of Michigan. She has a doctorate in Psychology and master’s degrees in Health Behavior-Health Education and Kinesiology from The University of Michigan. Her coaching service, EssentialSteps®, is sought after by women and companies nationwide.
Call-in Number: (646) 929-2625

A couple of months ago I wrote about getting back into shape after the birth of my second child. I must have struck a cord with moms because this was my most popular post so far!

I guess this shouldn’t surprise me. A recent study published in the American Journal of Preventative Medicine revealed that marriage, having kids and starting work are the most challenging times for women to exercise. We all know that parenting young children is a high-demand job. But no matter how easily it would be to justify, I just can’t give up exercise. Not only does it help me cope, it gives me the strength to do this very tough job. And after counseling clients for years, I know all to well that having babies is a time when excess weight can take root and grow.

As promised, I’m sharing with you my getting-back-into-shape progress. Every few months I review to see what’s working, what isn’t working and then develop a new plan.

But first…
A lot has been made about a Time magazine article claiming that exercise doesn’t help people lose weight. I’ve been familiar with this research for some time now. Basically, studies show that while exercise prevents weight gain, when it’s incorporated without reducing calories, it does little to budge the scale.

Fortunately weight is not the reason I exercise. After years of getting in tune with myself, I know that when I eat a balanced diet, honor my appetite and fullness, and exercise at a level that satisfies me, my weight seems to take care of itself. I also remember from nursing last time that my body likes to hold onto a few extra pounds until I wean.

I have to admit, after I got weighed in at the doctor’s a few months ago I was tempted to get rid of the extra weight fast. But if I did that I would’ve grown frustrated with my progress and ended up trying a more extreme approach. Then the extreme approach would’ve backfired because it would be difficult to sustain. Then I’d be back where I started.

Okay enough rambling…now to my progress.

What’s working
My goal was to build a fitness base and add on from there. The plan was to run when possible, do a postpartum core strengthening video on most days (15 minutes) and use hand weights a few times a week.

I’ve been most consistent doing the 15-minute postpartum video. This easily fits in my day and I really like how it has three levels, each getting a little bit harder. One time saver I discovered is that my 2-year old daughter loves to do the video with me. She yells “exercise” most days to signal her desire for the DVD and she usually wants to do it twice. We giggle a lot and repeat the lines. And it’s perfect to do during my son’s morning nap.

The early morning runs have also been going pretty well. Because my son has had trouble sleeping, there have been weeks where running early didn’t happen often. For me sleep trumps everything else. If I’m not getting sleep, I’m simply not productive.

At first I ran outside my place for about 20 minutes and have gradually worked up to 30-40 minutes. It was smart not to make any commitments to run because my son’s erratic schedule wouldn’t allow for it anyway. Being able to put on my shoes at a moment’s notice and head out the door has been key.

What’s not working
The at-home strength training never really happened. After the 15-minute video my desire to lift weights is nonexistent. So instead I’ve been doing the bare minimum at a gym at my mom’s apartment complex every Saturday.

I’ve come to the realization that exercise just isn’t going to happen after putting the kids to bed. I have tried to put off the video or weights for that time but I’m too resistant. I’d rather spend that time relaxing with my husband, writing for this blog or winding down. The more I try to do after 7pm, the later I seem go to bed – and that’s no good.

The new plan
A lot in my life has changed since that last post. First off, my son is (kind of) on a schedule and sleeps most of the night. My husband took a new job and I’m working two days a week. The best part of this change is I have a regular routine which makes it easier to plan. Based on my new schedule, this is what I’ve come up with to take my exercise up a level:

My husband will go into work late on Friday so I can get up and run. I plan to get up early Saturday and run before taking the kids to my mom’s. Sunday I’m going to do a whole body workout class at the gym (yeah!) down the street. Monday and Tuesdays are tough. I’m in negotiations with my mother-in-law to see if she can come over early one of those days so I can either take a spin class or run. I work Wednesdays and Thursdays. Eventually I might try to do something on my lunch (half-hour) when it cools down but for now I’ll just walk around as much as I can.

I’m going to discontinue the postpartum tape and move onto newer (and harder) Pilates/Yoga videos during my son’s early nap with my daughter on Monday, Tuesday and Fridays. I’ll move it up 5 minutes to a total of 20 minutes.

I want to join a running group but will hold off for now. I think I have enough on my plate!

So have I seen any results? I feel better and have more endurance running. My core feels stronger. And I finally weighed myself last week and found my weight down almost 7 pounds since that day 3 and ½ months ago. I’m not sure if it’s because of the exercise or just my body’s way of getting back to normal after the pregnancy.

Well that’s it for now. What do you do to stay in shape? Share your secrets with other moms. We need all the help and support we can get.

For more on this subject see Michelle Segar’s Habits of Highly Effective Exercisers on More.com

Subscribe to Raise Healthy Eaters for more mom-centered health tips.

Tuesday morning I went to the DMV to renew an expired license. While inching my way through the hour-long line it dawned on me that I might have to take a new license picture. The panic set in because I didn’t have a stitch of makeup on. When I made it to the front I was informed of the bad news.

I immediately made a b-line to the bathroom to apply some lipstick and mess with my hair. After my number was called (yes, more waiting) I was second in line to another woman. After her picture was taken the DMV employee looked at the screen and said, “Do you EVER take a bad picture?” When she took my picture she made a point to tell me to smile. After glancing at it she said, “Everyone looks better with a smile.”

I was mad at myself. Not because I’ll have to hide my license from everyone I know but because I’m still doing this stuff – putting off important tasks and basically being disorganized. It got me thinking about something I always come back to: Do I want my kids to follow in my footsteps? When they are adults will they be at the DMV renewing an expired license? Or worse?

What’s your weakness?
Last week I wrote about guilt-free ways to become a more positive food role model. If you struggle with eating well, managing your weight or preparing food you may feel the same way I felt after leaving the DMV. You don’t want your kids to acquire the same struggles but how do you change?

I feel like we spend so much of our lives tripping over our weaknesses, that we delay getting to the juicy part of living. It seems every time I’m almost there something holds me back, like wasting time at the DMV, losing my keys or searching the house for that important document.

Oprah talks about this all the time. It’s about stepping outside of yourself, thinking about what you really want and breaking the cycle.

A different outlook
When I stop beating myself up for a moment I realize that I’ve already made some changes. I sort of have a file system at home and do know where some things are. And compared to 10 years ago, I’m much better (I have a good story about my car getting impounded).

I know that guilting myself into making a temporary change won’t work so I remind myself to change my outlook instead. I acknowledge how more smoothly my daily life is when I’m organized and take the time to do time-consuming tasks. And I believe my family benefits as well.

So instead of “shoulding” yourself to change consider looking at the problem from a different angle. What are the benefits of changing? If you’ve been a chronic dieter how will you feel to finally be free of the constraints? If you don’t know how to cook think how gratifying it will be to prepare and enjoy meals for your family.

Whatever it is you’ve been struggling with find some reasons you want to conquer it – and decide those reasons for yourself and not because it’s something your doctor, spouse or even I want you to do.

How to change
Of course part of the problem with change is wanting for it to happen overnight. The old me would’ve run home from the DMV, gone through the mail, bought fancy organizing equipment and vowed never to do something like this again. But then 2 weeks later the mail would be piled up and I’d be back at square one.

I recently attended a class that reminded me of the most effective way to change. It’s called “continuous improvement” and it’s not about making a dramatic change. Instead, it’s about doing small, everyday things that eventually lead to big results. But the key is to make the changes consistently, not chaotically. The secret is to always be on the lookout for the little things you can do to get to your goal.

So, I’m looking for pockets of time at home to put away stuff and go through the mail. I even bought a (cheap) organizer to write important dates down. And every time I look at my license I’ll be reminded of the consequences of living a disorganized life.

This site will help you make small changes in the area of food, weight management and nutrition. If there’s something you need from me, or would like to see, let me know. From my experience, conquering lifelong problems is extremely liberating. And knowing your kids have escaped from the same struggle is the best reward.

Subscribe to Raise Healthy Eaters to get more articles on how to take better care of yourself.

Most parents know that when it comes to healthy eating habits, they act as role models for their children. But the messages targeted to parents are usually doused in guilt – “you had better eat healthy – your kids are watching you!”

The last thing any parent needs is more guilt. And furthermore, guilt does a poor job of motivating, inspiring and changing behavior for the long term. As a matter of fact, it’s pretty useless.

So drop the guilt and consider a different way of looking at – and becoming – a more positive role model for your kids.

Take a walk down memory lane: I’m always surprised when my overweight clients don’t understand the real reasons they overeat. After some digging, I usually find their childhood to be a contributing factor. After all, most food learning occurs the first 5 years of life.

So think about how your relationship with food came about. How and what did your parents feed you? Were they controlling or permissive or something in between? Did they make you clean your plate? Did they make eating vegetables seem like punishment and eating sweets the best reward? Did they overly restrict sweets or fatty foods? And if you were overweight, did they try to encourage to diet and eat less?

These questions are important because the answers give you insight into what has shaped your relationship with food. Even though you’re leading your children down a different path, if you continue to struggle with food or weight, they will catch on.

The best way to conquer your issues is to understand where they came from, let go of them and begin a new way of looking at food.

2. See food through the eyes of a child: While changing your outlook you’ll want to take lessons from young children. Babies are born a clean slate – they don’t have food baggage. They eat when they are hungry and stop when they are full. They don’t see food as good or bad unless they are told or shown it is good or bad. If they snack before dinner they won’t eat dinner (what adult does that?). They are masters at regulating food without counting calories or reminding themselves what they “should” eat.

So don’t diet or “should” yourself into eating healthy. Instead, dust off those hunger and satiety signals that you were born with and start listening to them again. Ask yourself if you’re really hungry before eating and when you do eat stop when your body tells you you’re satisfied and comfortably full.

3. Make feeding yourself a priority: When my daughter started solids I put all my energy into what she ate. Then one day, while picking at her tasty spinach and mushroom omelet, I realized what was going on. I was making feeding her a priority over feeding myself (and my husband – I always seem to forget about him). Before she was born, I’d buy the minimum amount of groceries, rotate the same 4 meals and rarely experimented with new foods.

I knew that a new, fierce love was behind my motivation to provide my daughter with tasty and nutritious food. So I used that love as a catalyst to take better care of myself.

So use love, not guilt, as motivation to take care of you. If you feed yourself well, taking the time to prepare plenty of fruits, vegetables and whole grains, then your child will grow up to be someone who makes feeding herself a priority.

4. Don’t try to be perfect: A friend was just telling me how her parents kept sweets and candy out of the house. She said that she and her siblings would take their weekly allowance and go buy sweets and candy. Her parents provided plenty of healthy food but forgot how to teach their kids how to eat the not-so-healthy foods.

Eating is not just about nutrition it’s also about enjoyment. Some foods provide pleasure without much nutrition. So show your children that you can enjoy items like ice cream, sweets and fried foods without guilt trips or overeating. And if you can’t do that quite yet, take some time to work on why you can’t. One of the books I recommend to help you come to peace with food is Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Program That Works

This takes away the pressure of eating perfectly for your children. They need a role model for how to eat all types of foods so when they are on their own someday they can eat with confidence.

The gift of health

Instead of scrutinizing yourself for missing the mark, remember that you’ve been given a gift. Your children are here to teach you how to be better – and that includes eating well and being active. By working to prevent them from creating bad habits, you end up saving yourself in the process.

Subscribe to Raise Healthy Eaters to get more tips on how to be a better role model for your kids.

I was a little cocky going into my six-week postpartum doctor’s appointment. After gaining the same amount of weight with my second pregnancy as I did with my first, I assumed my weight loss would be the same too. But when I stepped on the scale it revealed I was 10 pounds heavier than I was six weeks after my first child. Ouch!

Since that day seven weeks ago, I’ve been thinking a lot about how busy moms like me can get into shape. My experience tells me it’s more about being creative than finding extra time. To show you what I mean, I’ll share my getting-back-into-shape plan with you.

1. Why exercise in the first place?
Last year I read about a research study that confirmed something I already knew intuitively. Why you exercise can make or break your success.

I interviewed lead researcher, Michelle Segar, PhD, about her 2008 study published in Women’s Health Issues. Her research team asked 156 midlife women their reasons for exercising. The top five reasons included weight loss, health benefits, stress reduction, sense of well being and weight maintenance. Those who said they exercised for weight loss and health benefits, participated in significantly less exercise than those who exercised for stress reduction and a sense of well being

Michelle explained to me that exercising because you “should” is less motivating than doing it for your own reasons including how it makes you feel. The more I thought about it the more it made sense. I would have never kept exercising all these years if weight was my only motivator. So now I constantly remind myself how being active makes me feel both physically and mentally. After a workout I have a more positive outlook, am much more productive and present with my kids. And I have come to love the time to myself.

2. Do what you like
Nothing turns me off to exercise more than doing something I don’t enjoy. It doesn’t matter how many calories I burn or how good it is supposed to be for me, if I don’t like it I won’t continue to do it.

So I’ve decided to make running my priority when it comes to cardiovascular exercise. I used to run much more before having kids and I really miss it. Not only do I love it, but it’s easy to do, which is key for me at this point in my life. All I need are some running shoes, a good jogging bra and I’m good to go.

I also enjoy exercises that strengthen my body. I have always incorporated some weight training in my routine but it seems like forever since I’ve really challenged myself. After having 2 children, I no longer recognize my abdominal muscles which I mistakenly ignored between pregnancies. So I plan to slowly build a stronger body.

3. How to fit it in
There’s a part of me that wants to dive into exercise like the old me would. I could go to the gym 5 times a week, do tough classes and commit to long runs on the weekend. Not only is that not practical, it no longer fits my life. So I mourn the fact that I don’t have that kind of time – and quickly move on.

I have to start with where I am now. I have a nursing 3-month old and a somewhat high maintenance 2.5 year old (almost forgot my husband too). I just started working part-time and I run this wonderful blog. I simply don’t have big chunks of time available.

Since my 3-month old’s schedule is still unpredictable, it doesn’t make sense for me to commit to running with a group or try to catch classes at the gym. So instead I’ll be on the lookout for daily opportunities to run. Sometimes mornings are good when my husband is home. I also bring the kids over to my moms at least once a week making it easy to escape. And every Sunday afternoon we go to my in-laws so I can bring my running stuff and take off at just the right time.

I plan to do a 15-minute postpartum rescue tape most days to help my poor little core and will incorporate hand weights on the days I have more time.

The Plan
So my plan is to run when I can, do my postpartum core strengthening video on most days and use my hand weights a few times a week. After a month or two I’ll check back in with the why, what and how and change what isn’t working and add on to what is. And I’ll be sure to let you know how I’m doing.

I realize the best way for busy moms like me to get into shape is unique to individuals and constantly changing. What worked for me 6 months ago doesn’t work today. And what I’m doing today is sure to be obsolete for my life in 6 months. If, as a mom of growing and changing children, I had one set idea on how exercise “should” be I’d never do it. For me, that’s just not acceptable.

Have you found a way to balance exercise and your busy mom life? Let others know by leaving a comment below.

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